Every parent of either a boy or girl has a list of moments that they dread will inevitably happen. Yesterday we hit one of those times.
I was in the kitchen when molly came in and handed me my chap stick. It was half gone. Most of it on her lips the rest probably in her belly. Gotta love her. She really has been over that lately. Any way I take it so she won't use up any more and she starts to cry. "I need that back!" I ask her why and her response just breaks my heart. "Because I need to be perfect!" Seriously. She then continues "I need to be perfect like Anna!" (Frozen reference though I'm sure 99% of mom's got that)
Where on earth did she even get this idea of perfect or that she wasn't that. Or the idea that make up would make her so. Or that Anna is perfect? Just a million things run through my mind. Who even knows if I handled it right. A more tactful mom than me maybe.
Anyway I just replied you don't need make up to be perfect. Anna doesn't wear make up. Nobody is perfect. Since she is 2 the subject changed pretty fast but I can't help but wonder where the hell that came from?
It's easy to blame TV and maybe it was. I don't think I use the word perfect? Especially in that context. In my list of gushings over my daughters the word perfect isn't in there. I sure as heck don't say it about myself. At the same time I have tried so hard to really watch what I say about myself in front of her. To me it just seems like such a random thought for a 2 year old. The idea of perfection or that make up obtains it or that someone else is perfect. Someone she admires.
Make up is fun. More fun for people who know how to use it. For me it's about acne and not looking half dead more than it is smoky eyes and all that. I put on full make up for church and out of town outings. The 4 get together with friends each year. Other than that it's concealer and bronzer. Dressing up and doing your make up should be fun not crucial to feeling like you meet a standard. If it's not fun for you than you shouldn't do it at all. When I put on a little make up to leave the house it doesn't make me feel closer to perfect. It makes me feel good for myself not for the benefit of others. I've never been one of the girls that can't leave home without it. So maybe that's why I'm so caught off guard. This isn't what she sees yet she still knows it.
So dearest girls as you some day read this. Since my intentions are to print this so that in times like these you can read these words and know it's from my heart. You can cut through the rambling and over analyzing to this. You will never be perfect because no one is perfect. You can strive to be the best that you can be. You can have the insight to know what you need to improve and the drive to do it. The worse thing you can do is chase the illusion of perfection whether it is personal or physical. Another terrible thing would be for you to believe that being perfect requires you to be anything besides who you are.